Job Hunting and Flat Searching

Job hunting and searching for a place to live here in Auckland has been near impossible. There are hundreds of people looking for work at the moment that are fuller and better qualified than me, with the COVID 19 shutting things down there are so many of us looking for work now. I'm almost tempted to start looking for work and places to live in Whangaui and just moving with the family. It might be cheaper rent and there may be work opportunities that hopefully don't require a drivers license like a lot here do. 

It's either needs a license, needs more experience or your application was unsuccessful. It's slowly starting to get to me, I have my sisters and my boyfriend who help but the anxiety of it all is slowly getting worse again. In January/February I had a severe anxiety attack over finding a place to live, a job and a storage unit in (at the time) six weeks and I couldn't do it, I ended up cutting again and lost two of my best friends. One left without a explanation and the other I left. I cried out for help when I wanted to end my life to the wrong person. I now communicate those feelings to a online site called The Mighty where they help people with all sorts of mental disabilities including suicidal thoughts. It has definitely helped a lot.

13 Reasons Why

I see so much negativity towards this show but it has personally helped me so much. Each season in its own way has helped me understand and get through my depression and anxiety. 

It has helped me understand how my suicide could affect people who love me. It has helped me learn about Abortions for the first time as well as seeing drug use recovery. It helped me understand just how damaging rape was and how long a recovery can be. The speech Clay says at Hannah’s funeral still helps me today as well as the many things therapists throughout the show says. 

There are many things that are triggering in it for people who are struggling with the same issues as the characters and so many people wanted it to be removed. There are two parts that I will never watch again (Hannah’s suicide & broom assault) but I understand why they showed it. The first two seasons were triggering for me in a way but I more focused on the message they were putting out.