Writing Challenge - Cleaning

I really do hate cleaning
for proof just see my room
I do love to be organised though
it's just the lack of motivation
it doesn't trigger me as it use to
although I do still feel ashamed
there's people in my life who don't judge me
then there's those who shame me
my life is no where near organised
it's a lot like my room
I'm not happy nor depressed
I'm just very lonely I am told
that's why I turn to writing
that's why I turn to reading
I could always turn to cleaning but
where's the fun in that?
one day I will be better
the today me won't exist
at least not the me I will never miss
I need to fight these demons
they never seem to leave
one day I will get there
just you wait and see

E. Louise (c) 3/08/2018